I didn’t want that anymore.But then, I met Gregor and we hit it off right away. He was charming, thoughtful, and genuinely seemed to care about me. “I’ve waited my entire life for you, Abby,”
Gregor said when he showed up at my house with a bouquet of roses and an engagement ring tucked away in his palm. Our first year of marriage felt like one long honeymoon. We traveled together, laughed together non-stop, and truly enjoyed each other’s company.It seemed that we just fit with each other. Gregor was successful in his career, working as an executive at a well-known firm, while I was also doing well in my own career.
I worked for a marketing company and loved my job. Life was good, and I felt like I had it all.“I told you, Abby,” my mother said one day when I went to visit her with ingredients to make dumplings. “I know,” I chuckled. “I should have listened. But I’m happy now, and I think I finally got it right.” “It’s all going to be fine,” my mother said. “As long as you’re happy.”But then life threw a curveball.
The company I worked for went bankrupt, and just like that, I was out of a job. It was a blow, not just financially, but also to my confidence. I was good at my job, but there was just something about being unable to do it that made me feel like I wasn’t good enough.“It’s going to be okay,” I told myself as I sat at my desk for the last time. We had all been called in to pack up our belongings and just say goodbye. But deep down, I knew that although I prided myself on my independence and hated the idea of being reliant on anyone, Gregor was still there.
When I broke the news to Gregor, he seemed supportive at first. But it didn’t take long for his true feelings to surface.“What? Now, I’m going to be the breadwinner at home? The only breadwinner?” he asked with a hint of annoyance in his voice. “It’s just for now,” I said. “I’m going to start the job hunt as soon as possible.
But until I get back onto my feet, it’s going to be you running the home. Okay?” “Well, it’s not like I have a choice, right?” he said, rolling his eyes.“It’s not for long,” I promised. “Just give me a few weeks and I’ll have another job ready to go.” I had to admit, I was taken aback by his reaction, but understood his concern. I quickly started job hunting, determined to find something else. I sat down at my laptop and stared at the screen until the words blurred.“Come on, Abby,” I told myself. “You need to find something. You just need the world to give you a break, that’s all.” While I was searching, I took a temporary job as a cleaner in a nearby restaurant. It wasn’t glamorous, but it was honest work, and it helped keep us afloat. “At least your boss is happy to give us food,” Gregor said one evening as I unwrapped leftover steak and veggies from the restaurant.“Yes, the manager would rather have food sent home for our families to enjoy rather than just throw it out,” I said, cutting my steak. “It’s good food,” Gregor said. “But at the same time, it’s not a good job for you. Our family and friends are used to seeing you with your nails and hair done, wearing high heels and fancy outfits. Not black slacks and an apron, Abby.”“I know that,” I said. “But it’s not like I’ve settled for the job. I’m still actively looking for another job. This is to keep us going until then.” Gregor grunted and continued to eat. For a moment, I had no idea who my husband was. But this man wasn’t the one that I had married.Fast forward a few months to Gregor’s 45th birthday. My husband decided to throw himself a big bash at an expensive restaurant and invited all his friends, family, and colleagues. “So, he can complain about looking after his wife, but he’s fine with spoiling everyone else for his birthday?” my mother tutted on the phone.“I don’t know what else to tell you, Mom,” I said. “It’s just how he is. But I’m looking forward to this. It’s my first weekend off in a while and I just want to unwind and have fun.” “I know, darling,” she said. Admittedly, I was excited for the night, thinking it would be a chance for us to relax and just spend time together outside of our home.“Happy birthday, my love,” I said to Gregor when we got to the restaurant. I had called ahead and asked for them to set up black and silver balloons around the table Gregor had reserved. The night started off well, with good food, laughter, and drinks flowing freely. As the evening went on, tipsy people began to make toasts.First, was Gregor’s sister, Natalia. “You’re lucky to have Abby in your life, brother,” she said, holding two glasses of champagne. “She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to you.” I felt touched by her words and smiled, feeling appreciated. Gregor’s friend, Tim, went next, talking about the joys of having Gregor in the office next door.Finally, it was Gregor’s turn to speak. He stood up, his glass of champagne in hand, and began laughing before he even said a word. “Oh, I know I’m lucky, Nat,” he said. “But let’s be real, Abby is lucky too! She’s basically my dependent now. I’d have kicked her out a long time ago if she wasn’t so obedient. It’s just a pity I invested all that money in her over the years.”Gregor hiccupped and reached for a piece of shrimp from his plate. The table fell silent, and my insides twisted more than they ever had. Embarrassed wasn’t enough to describe how I felt. He was laughing, expecting everyone else to join in. Some people chuckled awkwardly, not knowing what to do, but most people looked around uncomfortably.Gregor took another piece of shrimp before he dissolved into laughter for a while. “Come on guys, that was a killer joke!” he bellowed in between laughing. But then, as I sat there, something clicked inside me. I decided I wasn’t going to let him get away with this behavior. This was toxic behavior.I wasn’t going to allow that back into my life. Calmly, I stood up and took a deep breath. “Well, Gregor,” I said. “It seems like you’re forgetting a few things. But let me remind you and everyone else about some investments I’ve made.” All eyes were on me as I spoke, and Gregor’s smug smile slowly faded away.“You see,” I started. “While you’ve been investing in me, you’ve also been busy investing. The money you used to fund this luxurious celebration didn’t come from your account.” Gasps erupted around the room. “I saw the notification,” I said. “You took it from my savings fund. You don’t believe me? I can pull up the statement on my phone right now…”“No…” Gregor said. “I was willing to overlook this because we were a team, but it seems that we’re not. I know that you only took out the money to reserve this place, and that the rest of the bill needs to be paid when we leave here. Correct?” Gregor nodded slowly. “Correct,” he muttered.“And I have the money with me, right in my purse,” I said. “I wanted you to have a good birthday, and I didn’t want you to pay for your own birthday dinner.” I looked around the table, seeing the realization dawn on everyone’s faces. “But do you know what? I think I’ll just keep it, along with my dignity.” With that, I calmly walked off the stage and out of the restaurant.I don’t know how Gregor paid for the dinner, but I didn’t care. Instead, I went home and packed as much of my clothes as my car would allow, and I drove to my mother’s place. I wasn’t going to stay in a toxic relationship again.What would you have done?
